


Levi and the Gods Of Cleanliness

by WingsOfValkeria



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Eren is a hormonal teenager, I pity new recruits, M/M, levi's a clean freak, suggested activites
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-31
Updated: 2014-08-31
Packaged: 2018-02-15 14:43:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2232813
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WingsOfValkeria/pseuds/WingsOfValkeria
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Apparently, there is no sanity in the corps. None at all. And Eren will soon learn that Hanji is not the most insane of them all. Or the most eccentric to their passions.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Levi and the Gods Of Cleanliness

It was going to be a long day, Eren could tell just by the fact that Levi’s glare was especially brutal this morning. The only way he could ever hope to describe this glare, was that if glares could destroy matter, the colossal titan would be no more. But that was a wish for another day.  The only thing that put his mind to rest however in the face of impending doom, was that it was not directed at him, but towards one of the new recruits that he hadn't really bothered to remember their name. The only information that he did know about this particular recruit, was that they had particularly poor in their cleaning duties, and as per protocol, Captain Levi tore them a new one. Before the soldiers were excused to complete their daily chores, Levi ordered that no one disturb him, not that much of an off occurrence, but still strange to Eren, considering his aura of death. His day went by normally after this strange occurrence, he went about doing his normal chores; scrub the floors, each stone 10 times to be exact, clean each and every window from inch to square inch, dust every corner and violently inform every particle in current existence that it was on its way to a fiery hell by fury of a feather duster. As Eren was taking his beak, the commander motioned him over, with eyes filled with a new light termed curiosity, he walked over to the welcoming man.

‘Ah, Eren, would you mind taking some documents to Levi for me?’ Erwin’s normal demeanor was off, his eye twitching slightly, a new occurrence for the poor recruit. ‘It is of the utmost importance that you deliver this to him for me.’

Eren’s head tilted sideways in an awkward glance as his brows furrowed under his confusion,

‘Sir.. Why me in particular?..’ Erwin then visibly paled, yet another unworldly event in the mass of the first twelve hours of the day. Adjusting his bolo tie, fidgeting slightly, he sighed in exasperation,

‘It’s... his day of the month...’ he mumbled. Eren somehow got the feeling that he really didn’t want to know, and as inconspicuous that the poor boy could muster, he attempted to flee. As this was not something he wanted to fight if the commander was as shaken up as he currently was. Before he could even take a step, or even motion to anywhere that wasn’t Erwin, an arm grabbed him firmly on the upper bicep, and crystal blue eyes, which have been used for manipulation and that normally gleamed with determination, shone deeply to him in the darkest puppy-dog eyes that the commander apparently could muster. Which was pretty damn good.

‘You don’t seem to be understanding what I am telling you here Eren. This is not a choice. YOU do not have a choice. He needs to see these papers and anyone who can’t clean at least a third of his standards are doomed if they come near him right now!.’

‘I-I uh-understand? S-sir? But...the captain...is a man.. You make it sound as if he’s on a period or something...’

Erwin chuckled at this, slowly gaining his composure again, yet still visibly pale.

‘Ah... no... he has something that is just about as bad.’ Erwin handed Eren a thick stack of papers, ‘He just needs to look these over and give them back to you to give back to me. Easy as that. And make sure he does it right when you give it to him, lord knows what he might do to them...’ And with that, the commander disappeared, through which way, Eren hadn't the slightest fucking clue, except that Erwin was fucking nuts, and he was pretty sure that there was no sanity anywhere in the corps.

 

Eren took his time climbings the steps going up to Levi’s quarters. He can’t say that he didn’t normally enjoy the encounters he had as he always enjoyed speaking with the Captain, no matter how much of a perpetual scowl the man held. However, today was indeed a spectacle. But, if the uninterpretable scowl Levi had during the morning and Erwin’s funky behaviour a while back was anything to go by, it was pretty safe to assume that this encounter with his dear Captain would not be like any other he had previously shared with his vertically challenged superior.  As Eren arrived at the door to Levi’s personal quarters he heard a series of very curious noises. Most of which were unintelligible ramblings about bleach. Fearing for his captain’s sanity he burst in the room to find that his captain was no where in sight. Listening closer for the mumbling, he found the source coming from a closet door of which he had suspected the captain kept his personal belongs. Cautiously he walked over to the door which had a soft glow emanating from the crack on the bottom. The mutterings had gotten somewhat louder, and Eren could only get various names of cleaning supplies, and certain sounds of agreement. Suddenly, the door slammed open, knocking Eren to the ground, craning his neck up to meet the stormy eyes of his superior, in all out cleaning garbs. The most frightening part of it all... was that he was wearing a french maid outfit. Eren’s face immediately flushed as he stuttered his reasons for interrupting Levi’s time with what was apparently a beautiful shrine all dedicated to...cleaning supplies. Lavender and rose petals littered a velvet covered area where scented candles and incense were burning surrounding a silver basin. Surrounding the area on manageable shelves were various assortments of cleaning supplies that were normally used during the daily chores, feather dusters of all varieties lining the walls, brooms for display as if they were prized family heirlooms.

‘Jaeger. Why in all the ever living fuck are you in my room? When I explicitly said that no one was to disturb me.’ Levi’s voice sounded as if it were the very velvet that lined that very conspicuous room, yet it grit at his ears and his face flushed to an even more bashful color. But, of course now his not so platonic, more so lustful feelings suddenly coming out at the worst possible of times, blood rushing to places that really shouldn’t be rushed to in front of his superior, who was in a scandalizing revealing, yet very beautiful maid’s outfit. Which Eren’s hormonal mind just had to mention that he had access to a very nice view of under the short skirt his captain was currently in. Averting his eyes to another blood traffic directing cause, he looked up into his captain’s scalding mercurial eyes.

‘I was uh... sent to have you sign some papers for the commander... and was not to leave till they were finished, sir.’ Eren desperately tried thinking about horseface in the same outfit, attempting to kill his nearly very noticeable erection.

‘Tch.. Of course he fucking would.’ He mumbled under his breath, placing his hands on his hips, somehow popping one hip out, making what he believed to be a very masculine captain, very feminine. The new position, could only have Eren focusing on Levi’s legs, thick with well trained muscle, calloused from where the gear constantly rubbed, leaving darkened marks on his otherwise porcelain skin, his eyes slowly traveling up, when he then realized that the very object of his fascination was coming closer to him at an alarming rate.  Eren quickly attempted to scamper backwards, but he was pinned down by calloused hands.

‘Wake the fuck up Jaeger. Have some shame.’ He growled, making it even more difficult for Eren to redirect the flow of blood back to his brain, where he knew he would need it. But, that idea was crushed, stomped upon, burned and then the ashes were thoroughly scattered to the four corners of the earth when Levi sat fully on his crotch, where Eren let out a very dignified yelp. Levi gave a soft scoff at his response, and gave a firmer hold as he removed one of his hands to grab the paper work which was being crumpled to an illegible mess in Eren’s frustration.

‘I really don’t feel like reading these fucking things. Are you really going to stay here until I finish them, brat?’ Levi looked down expectantly at him, placing the paperwork on Eren’s chest as he pulled down the neckerchief that was filtering the aroma of bleach and whatever else was in that room that Eren could not see.

‘Of course!  It was a direct order! I’m not going to disobey it.’ To Eren’s surprise, his voice did not quiver, however at this Levi threw a smirk at the boy.

‘Have it your way kid... Might as well make use of you. You are the best at cleaning in the castle, so for that, and that alone, I’ll let you stay unharmed. But, you’re going to help me with something...’

With that said, Levi promptly got off the sputtering hormonal teenager, grabbing him by the front of his shirt, dragged him to a wobbly legged standing position. Not even a second after Eren regained his footing, he was being dragged into the mysterious room with a skirted Levi. A cramped, scented room with romantic lighting. Fuck.

Levi closed the door behind them as he left Eren in the center of the surprisingly actually roomy closet, giving him a chance to see this... domain... close up. The shelves had straw baskets lining their insides, filled with clothes and polishes. Some were of the most expensive variety, of which could not be found anywhere but the interior of wall Sina.

‘This, is my sanctuary, a shrine to all that is right in this shitty world. Dedicated to whatever gods gave cleanliness to man. The days where I am in here, solely to be in a perfect world of calm and cleanliness, are when the world is most dirty and shit filled. ‘ Levi walked around him as he explained the purpose of the room, staring at him as he stopped in front of the poor shifter.  His eyes molten as he once again took hold of the front of Eren’s shit and yanked him down to where they were eye to eye.

‘S-sir?’

‘Tell me Eren... What is it that these new recruits are lacking? Do you know?’

‘Skills?..’ Levi scoffed at that and sent a glare his way, making Eren flinch.

‘Yes, skills, but of what kind, Eren?’

Eren thoughts were in the most hectic disarray, blood in places where it really shouldn’t, making his pants unbearably tight. However when Levi yanked him further forward, nearly making him fall, he distinctly remembered why his captain was in the worst possible of moods just the day before. They couldn’t clean. Even Eren had been appalled at the shear failure of abilities in the cleaning department. Not very shabby in fighting either, making one wonder if Shaddis had lost his touch. Eren quickly replied,

‘Cleaning, sir. They can’t clean.’

‘There we go Jaeger! Those little fucking brats couldn’t clean properly if the threat of a titan was on their ass. You actually  have been the only success in my training to perfect the art of cleaning. However, one particular brat has practically insulted the gods of cleanliness, of purity, and it is up to me to put them in their place. And since you are adamant to staying by my side till I apparently finish this paperwork... You are going to help me appease the gods.’

Eren made an audible gulp, as Levi slowly released him and went to the basin Eren assumed was filled with bleach, which to his surprise just turned out to be sudsy water where Levi beckoned him over.

‘Strip.’

Eren’s eyes widened into saucers as he stilled by the basin.

‘S-sir?’

‘If you’re going to assist me, you must be clean. Now do as you are told.’

Eren reluctantly did as he was told, removing the straps of the maneuver gear, and starting from the top, he took off his shirt, his actions being strictly scrutinized by his captain. When he finally got to removing his pants, he groaned in discomfort as he rid himself of the garment. When he looked up again, his captain’s eyes had widened and just as quickly returned to their normal scrutiny. Grabbing a dampened cloth from the sudsy water, he pulled Eren down to his knees, the two facing eachother, Eren’s breathing significantly quickening, as his captains eyes raked down his body.

‘Well I suppose, we’ll just have to take care of everything then.’

 

Later that evening when it was finally dinner time, Eren was made to sit next to his captain as he waited for Erin to finish looking at the documents. The commander now calmed, was sitting at the head of the table. Erwin’s eyes observed the rest of the soldiers in the room, some of the new recruits looking worn and washed. One cadet was particularly flushed, the color absent from his face, and to Erwin’s knowledge the boy had dark hair, not pale, bleached hair.

‘Ahem, Levi...’

‘What?’ He answered impatiently, ‘I did the paperwork like you wanted.’

Eren fidgeted in his seat, catching onto the commanders peak of interest.

‘The boy... What did you do to him?’

‘Ah, He was cleansed, and will be forever clean.’ Levi smirked, announcing this with a proud satisfaction.  ‘Isn’t that right Eren?’

‘Ah... yes.. H-he was purged of his ah..filth... No more will he disgrace the gods of cleanliness. A sacrifice and example to others.’

Erwin’s eyes widened and he heaved a great sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose.

‘Of course he was.. Of course he was...’

  
  



End file.
